Sellers Remorse, it’s hitting hard. A lot of if only’s … if only we waited until summer, we could have bagged another $100k from the sale, if only we had known how impossible this market was going to be, if only we had done more research, more prayer, if only, if only, if only. If only there were more homes for sale in locations that meet our criteria and maintain our amazing lifestyle.
The other week I was talking to my mom and she asked what the house hunt was like and I told her it was crazy and she said, “Well, you are never going to find anything like what you had in Glenwood.” Awesome. Thank you. I said, “I know, we aren’t because we aren’t looking for anything like we had in Glenwood.”
And that’s the truth, we sold with the intent of moving away, finding another locale to settle where everything was new, all the hikes, all the river runs, all the riding, all the climbing, all the people…everything new. Glenwood served its purpose, it was a great small town to raise kids in, but it is a small city inhabited by a lot of entitled wanna-be-Aspenites with egregious traffic woes. But now, a few weeks or so after that conversation with my mom, we have come full circle. Not that we want to stay here, but our oldest daughter is here, our oldest son and his wife have moved back …we can’t leave. I can’t leave.
In all seriousness. Our goal is to keep everyone close, to be a network of support, love and encouragement. We can’t actually dip now. Seems outlandishly stupid to me. They are on the cusp of marriage and family life … grandchildren who I would get to be close to and know and love, devote my golden years to … something I’ve always ALWAYS wanted. To turn my back on all of that? Not possible.
Why didn’t these thoughts occur to us prior to selling, you might be wondering? Well, they did, but in the same starry eyed, faith-filled optimism that we make every decision, we shrugged it off because…well because of a lot of different things that were said. And since reality wasn’t glaring me in the face, it was off in the future somewhere, I was able to ignore it, but now I’m living it and the painful realization that we effed up is clear. We had a house (albeit one we weren’t in love with), we had a community, we just got greedy and wanted more …
Not entirely true, but it’s how I’m starting to frame it in my mind. However, that’s not the whole truth. We were actually being kinda selfless. Our whole life has been about family. We wanted land because we wanted a homestead, shoot Dan has always wanted land. And, while it might sound crazy, this whole hit 18 and repeat all the same struggles, start from ground zero and endure all the same sufferings as ALL the generations before you sounds asinine to me. So, we saw an opportunity to get out and shoot for the moon. And I was certain this was God’s will. But, I’m not gonna lie here, I’m feeling a little abandoned. A little scourged. I’m feeling a little forgotten in my waiting. We just aren’t seeing many homes for sale in Colorado.
Life is difficult right now. I’m not going to go into all the boring, pity party details, because honestly I’m well aware that I have it pretty damn good. We have a roof over our head, we have food, we have each other and we are having a lot of fun. I will also tell you that our kids are not experiencing any difficulty, this is their element, they love everything about our life right now. I wish I was more like them, able to find the beauty, the joy in everything. But I am carrying what feels like the world on my shoulders. It’s an enormous burden and I really need someone to come in and tell me what to do. A burning bush, really. Barring that, I think I’m going to remain in this unfamiliar cycle of fear. Fear of commitment. Fear of leaving. I mean, I even have a fear of the future, of the unknown … what is happening? Who am I? I don’t even recognize myself.
But the stakes are so high … I’m almost incapable of moving in any direction.
Why this decision? Why now am I so over the edge with anxiety? I swear with this overly verbose blog, I’m not seeking pity, or anything of the sort, I’m just out here living the best life I can and have hit a snag. A momentary lack of clarity, peace and consolation. This too shall pass, my main goal in sharing this is to be transparent, to show the struggle of being the exact opposite of where we expected to be right now, but still trying to make the most of the time we have now. It’s so easy to forget about the blessings that exist in life, while we are fervently praying for others. It’s so easy to forget about the beauty that exists in life while focusing on what is lacking. I am trying (and most likely failing miserably) to be present in each moment, open to God’s goodness, beauty and loving hand in my day … just as it is, as imperfect as it is. These are days I will never get back, and if I wait for perfection, I will die waiting.
Maybe this is the advice I should be giving myself regarding the home search … BUT (with good advice, the receiver almost always has a “but”, right?) all the homes are so inflated. Like, a house we went to look at was purchased in March 2020 (just last year) for $610k and is now, one year later with no value added, at a whopping $1.1M … that’s more than an 80% increase, in one year. I can’t wrap my head around that, can you? At the same time, though, these are the options before us. These inflated insanely over priced homes. We either buy a home, any home, and suck it up for a few years, hope the market continues to sky rocket or we wait and hope the market levels out, that the end of the moratorium on foreclosures will help ease the market a little? Or at the very least, that a few more properties will come on the market?
Anyone have any insight? A crystal ball? Any predictions regarding the market? Buying land and building? Anything? Any advice at all?
And of course, let us know if you or anyone you know has a house they are thinking about selling and has not yet made it to the MLS. Ha Ha, it was worth a try. And, I’m being dead serious, someone knows someone …
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