Thank You Women

Let me ask you. Do women have a place in the intellectual world? Is it unattractive for a woman to have opinions and to feel compelled by the Holy Spirit to do whatever she can to make the world a better place for the sake of her children? Can a woman be wildly feminine and be a bear when it comes to protecting her family? Does she have any place outside the home?

This may seem obvious to most, if not all of you, but there are some people in the fringe of society who have chosen to manipulate their religion into something grotesque. They are using their religion as a way to elevate themselves and denegrate all women. I’m floored at the lengths they will go and I’m no femininist. I truly believe if you are a mother, you have an obligation to stay home with your children, regardless of the sacrifice. I don’t want to hear all the “but what if’s”, especially the “what about single moms?” I have a friend who is a single mom to 2 kids and she stays home, works AND homeschools. Owned. “But not everyone can do that” — Why not? She sacrifices on every social level known to man to do what is right for her kids, why can’t you? What is your specific excuse?

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I also believe that men are the head of the household. {gasp} That does not mean I demurely accept decisions handed down from the great Dan, rather, it means he’s responsible for a whole lot of stuff and he gets a great title that occasionally means he gets the last word on things. We are a team in this wonderful Sacrament of Marriage. We both bring a uniqueness to our family. I am nurturing, loving, caring and emotional. Dan is strong, level-headed and calm. We have a good cop/bad cop thing going. Dan goes out and reasons with the world. If that doesn’t work, I go in and holler, cry or threaten the world. And, lastly if that should fail, Dan simply beats the tarp outta the world. It works, it’s always worked. We complete each other. Dan is the first one to admit he needs me. And I need him. This is God’s plan, not some altered third world view of marriage, but a union, where two people become one for the benefit of each other and the world.

But, when it comes to our children, you better believe I am not just a pretty face in a lace dress, black flats and panty hose. Gag. Nope. I’m a mother bear, I am a carnivore in stilleto heels, a short dress and plunging neckline. Anyone who has been within earshot of me when I am upon my prey knows I AM the embodiment of Jekyll and Hyde. Is that feminine? In the eyes of God, yes. In Pope John Paul’s eyes, yes. I am a mother, I fight for the rights and well-being of my children.

I understand the man who spent his entire young life being ridiculed and picked on and made to feel nothing less than pathetic. I understand his need to exert himself and to right those wrongs. But you don’t do that from a religious pulpit. You do that in the gym – (though i’ve recently been told men don’t say gym, they say “lift weights”). You do that by learning to fight, perhaps? It is nothing less than disgraceful, and without a doubt a grave sin when a religion is distorted and scripture taken out of context, twisted and turned into a publicity stunt for someone to reinvent and raise themselves over others.

Where did this come from? Well, I was told by someone who holds himself up to be the next coming of Christ that I ought to forget about the upcoming elections and “vote for whomever Dan votes for”. That made Dan chuckle. There goes Free Will he said. I was then referenced in a blog by this same person that I was unfeminine because I am involved in political discussions, I was unfeminine because I promote and protect my religious beliefs, I was chastised and told that a woman’s place is under her husband’s foot, that her only job is in the home raising her children and serving her husband. This, shockingly, made me angry. It made me sad. It made me feel compelled to pray for him and his poor family. Dan of course loved it. He LOL and made references all night as to my place in the family. But Dan’s ideas were slightly different, it was more white T-shirt and water related.

I wonder about this man’s wife. But, she’s an adult, she made her bed. More-so I worry about his children. His sons will grow to be like their father – an egotistical man, who has found small minded minions whose only desire is to serve God to follow him in his quest for respect and validity under the guise of Catholicism. I worry for his daughters who will grow up without strength of character, without the ability to say no, without the ability to question anything. They will undoubtedly have his twisted version of religion imprinted on their brain. The devil is out there, Satan is lurking and God have mercy, for they know not what they do.

I am a wife, a mother and a crusader for a better world for my family. I believe God has imprinted my fighting spirit on my soul. Who am I to question Him? Why would I take a gift God gave me and let it wilt? I was born with a competitive nature, I was born with a quest for extremes and excitement. These are traits given to me by God. How would this man like me to channel these specific character traits? I could, perhaps enter a meatloaf competition? Is that feminine? Probably not, it’s a competition. The Garden Club could be an option, but God did not bless me with a green thumb, nor does our community have a garden club. I suppose I could get my adrenaline rush from disobeying Dan, but I’ve never been an obedient person, I’ve never allowed anyone to infringe upon my God-given right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness, so that’s out as well.

This last sentence just begs the question of consequences. What, pray-tell, happens when she disobeys him? And, yes he does use this word. And, yes it does happen, because no-one is perfect … no-one. So she is a naughty wife and disobeys. Is she punished? Sent to her room? As a mom of 11 I would do whatever it took to be sent to my room, I’d be the most disobedient wife on the planet. It would be chaos. “Where’s mommy.” “She was sent to her room…again.”

As parents it is our God given responsibility to help our children find their strengths, their talents and their inner beauty. I have 6 boys, all of them are warriors. I have 5 girls, two are girly girls, competition doesn’t interest them, extreme sports, not so much. They are artistic and musically inclined. I have none of their talents. I have two girls for whom competition is their very nature. They compete in everything from who can finish school first, who gets the best grades to who is the fastest snowboarder, who can do the most tricks and who can stay on the wave the longest. The jury is out on little Elly, but if her spirit continues on the path she’s on now, we’ll have a sweet baby loving girl who fights for what she believes in. Who am I to curb her enthusiasm, to mold her into something other than that what God has plans for? We work with our children’s spirits, not against them.

Be very wary of false prophets, my friends. Glory is always given to God, not to priests, fathers or prophets. Married life is a bridge to God. As mothers we feed our children from our own bodies, they will eventually wean themselves of our milk, but we continue to feed their bodies, mind and soul. It is a huge responsibility. A parent’s love, no matter how good, is imperfect. It was never meant to take the place of God’s love. It was meant to foster a way to God’s love. It is our responsibility to remain humble and be strong, solid, if not fallible, bridges to God. “The Glory is given to God and thank God that he has given us the gifts of married life that we may have a glimpse, that we may have a way, that we may have a bridge to our Father in Heaven.” — Fr Michael Denk

Please read the below Letter From Pope John Paul II. It’s beautiful and describes eloquently and beautifully the role women play in today’s society. God made us all so very different and each of us is glorified in God’s eyes. Please, please take 5 minutes click the link and read the letter. God Bless.

http://www.vatican.va/holy_father/john_paul_ii/letters/documents/hf_jp-ii_let_29061995_women_en.html

PS-Sorry, R.A. … it’s all good.